Shesneat

Jen

2011-10-12T21:21:00.000-07:00

Family Photos

2011-10-01T22:36:00.000-07:00

Mom and Dad

2011-10-01T22:12:00.000-07:00

Taj, Linda and Family

2011-10-01T21:49:00.000-07:00

Emily, Michael and Family

2011-10-01T21:41:00.000-07:00

Ben and Amanda and Family

2011-10-01T21:25:00.000-07:00

Matt, Mette and Family

2011-10-01T21:02:00.000-07:00

Sledding

2011-02-05T21:30:00.000-08:00

MUSH MUSH!
Landon and I

She's so pretty

Cookies And Cream On The Outside, Devil On The Inside

2011-02-05T20:34:00.000-08:00

My life has been filled with so many new experiences, thoughts, feelings, emotions, fears, responsibilities and joys that I have never been faced with before. I worry that the kids wont find the right kind of friends and then if they do will be the right kind of friend back? I stress about money. I'm learning how to cultivate real and long lasting relationships among deep throngs of emotional insecurities and fears. I've had to learn to be more selfless and patient. I've had to stay up later and get up earlier. My life has evolved from a single girls life to a mother of three.

With this new life I'm creating comes all sorts of battles. None of which are truly as big as they feel at the time of fruition. There are times that I feel my heart jumping up into my throat and it's all I can do to not lash out uncontrollably. it's over the dumb things too. Underwear on the floor, not going to sleep fast enough, can't decide what to eat for dinner, fighting over video games... (the list could go on forever...) But when it comes to the things that really matter I have a soft heart and an open mind. I can have compassion in difficult situations. Patience when there's a broken heart.

I've always envisioned myself being the free spirited and happy-go-lucky mother. Now that I'm near that role my perspective has changed a bit. I don't think being a true parent allows you to be JUST the fun parent. I believe to be a parent that your children will come to love and respect you have to have rules and stick to them. You have to force responsibility on your kids bad behavior. You HAVE to be able to yell louder than the TV or stereo! I think Drake put that sort of contrast perfectly when he told me the other day "Rachel, you're like cookies and cream on the outside and on the inside you're like the devil."

Kids are awesome!

I FEEL JUST LIKE THAT!!! I FEEL sweet, delicious, fun and enjoyable like cookies and cream so much of the time. Then other times I TOTALLY feel like the devil. I yell, get frustrated, discipline and fume. I know I'm not perfect. I will try to have more cookies and cream moments than devil moments. I will learn to love more perfectly.

(As I'm writing this Drake came down and performed a mime show for me.... cookies and cream...)

MANfriend

2011-01-10T17:53:00.000-08:00

As you can see from the colossal gap from my last post to now you may be wondering if I'm serious about this blogging thing. Honest answer? No... no I am not. However, I do think this can be a great forum for me to get my thoughts and feelings out and NOT talk my boyfriends ear completely off. One man can only exhaust so much patience. Oh, and yes, you heard me right... I DO have a boyfriend!

The term "boyfriend" really does NOT do this guy justice though. I have never met someone who is farther from being defined as a boy as he is. So from now on I will call him my MANfriend.

Just to make sure we are all on same page I will give you my definition of a manfriend. Cause I looked it up online and I didn't really like those results. So for all intents and purposes we'll stick with mine. A guy who is worthy of the "Manfriend" title is one who will stay up with you when you're having an irrational emotional breakdown and doesn't make you feel stupid. He is one, who in the midst of greatest difficulty, takes a hold of his responsibilities and takes care of them with flare! He is the type of guy who knows your greatest weaknesses and fears, loves you anyway and is able to make them your strengths. He forgives. He is patient. He is willing to say he's sorry and actually means it. He takes the time to play princess with his daughter, video games with his sons and still takes you out. He does NOT have to know how to fix the kitchen sink but he will give it his all trying. He works hard for his family. He loves his children and he fights for his relationships.

Why you may ask, is this man deemed worthy of the manfriend title? Because he is and does everything in that list and more. He is the epitome of a man.... and I am a VERY lucky woman.

Loves,
Rachel

Learning to Fall

2009-05-24T17:29:00.000-07:00

I was sitting in my front room watching my new little nephew learn to walk. He would start by hoisting himself onto his hands and knees. Then using his forehead and hands he would push himself up to his feet, teeter back and forth and then fall. No less than .76 seconds later he would be right back at it hoisting, lifting and undoubtibly falling on his face. As the rug burns continously grew larger and larger I could see his frustration slowly grow. Then, after the 1,059th try he stood for 8 seconds, took one step and fell once more. However, with that one step, that one tiny victory, all the frustration from the previous tries was washed away.

I've always heard that we must be like a little child. But, for the first time, I started to take it to heart. If this little kid, who has no experience teaching him that he will in fact be able to stand up and walk, keeps trying then why on earth wouldn't I keep getting up after I fall?!

Looking back on my life I can see clearly those few moments that I have, without a second thought, immediately worked on getting right back up. But, I can also see those times in my life when I let fear, frustration and pride get in the way of my progression. I am grateful for both types of experiences because I have learned about myself and what type of person I would like to become.

So, as I start this whole new blog process I would like to dedicated to you and myself that I will strive to be the person who will continue to stand up, full of faith after every fall.

Loves,
Rachel :)